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14 August 2001 @ 08:51 pm
Diagnosis  
Went back to see Dr. Brandt today...it was pretty grim. I apparently do have major blockage, but I weigh too much for their table! (Cutoff is 300 pounds and I'm 18 over.)

For that and to help lower risks, he wants me to lose 30 pounds. If I keep having pain, though, he says there are places that can do the angioplasty at my present weight.

And to do the procedure I'll have to agree to bypass surgery if they need to on an emergency basis. I really don't like the idea of bypass surgery though. The recent articles about cognitive deficits...watching my Mom become an invalid...I'd have to do some research.

Well, I just took my first nitro tablet. I had some slight pain in my chest, I figured it was time to try it out. It seems to have helped. I called Sam and talked to her for awhile. I explained what's going on, trying to be upbeat about it. I'm going to see her Saturday.

Jonathan's baby sounds are cute over the phone. :)

I also talked to Randa. I left a message for Becca to call me.

I got a disabled placard so I can go into work and park nearby. I'm going back tomorrow.

I'm still kind of stunned. I know last winter I had the sense that I had blockage...but I was thinking it might not be too late to reverse it. This spring I went after the orthotics because I wanted to walk, get in shape, and limit my risk factors.

Now...time has run out and until they can treat me, I can't exercise at all.

Meanwhile, poor Dave is just as stunned as I am. I feel like I've let him down because I didn't take better care of myself. He feels bad about taking me out to eat too often! I guess we both need to let go of that and focus on now, while we're together.

It would seem that Texas is not feasible. I need to keep my insurance coverage. We'll have to figure out another way.

At least we had a great weekend and saw Tool. That was the best concert I've seen.
 
 
Current Mood: scaredscared