Tapati (tapati) wrote,
Tapati
tapati

Pretty Happy Thoughts

I wrote this today.

Just think positive he said just forget all that negative stuff what a bringdown if you just think positive all good things will come into your life and I think will the memories of his fists recede like a wave to be replaced by pretty happy fairy dust will all women magically rise up and leave their abusers if I shut up and just think happy pretty thoughts and will their children magically forget the scenes of violence in their homes day after day or night by night as they lie huddled under their covers hands over ears wishing it would all go away and their daddy would love their mommy again or their mommy didn’t deserve it the stupid bitch but they are half mommy half daddy so they hate or fear part of themselves but it will all go away if I just shut up and think happy pretty thoughts of oceans and lakes and river streams and nature and shit like that or maybe just shit because that’s what violence against women and children is our subconscious shit manifest upon this earth in rivers of blood and landscapes of bruised flesh and sometimes a corpse or two even whole families murdered because some man couldn’t share his woman or kids or some woman went mad from abuse or having too many kids too fast too soon too much postpartum depression craziness from not thinking pretty happy thoughts while she carpooled and bottle fed and listened to the crying of her brood who she sacrificed all hope of being herself for and one day she snapped and thought they’d be better off free of her resentful presence and she meant to go with them but when it was all done she lie dazed and spent yes if I just think positive thoughts all these things will be automagically solved and world peace will break out and global warming will just chill or maybe chill too much are we ready for the ice age yet and what will we do when we run out of oil but I must think pretty happy thoughts and we’ll find new technologies while chanting Om or affirmations and our mental masturbation will sustain us in our time of need we need I need you need some peace and if I think happy thoughts then peace will come but I wonder how all these things will happen if we don’t name the problems if we don’t claim our solutions if we don’t step up and step out of this crazy paradigm if we don’t look at the shit at the steaming piles of shit we’ve made if we just pretend it smells like roses and live behind our new age poses will it just evaporate or will it penetrate?
Tags: dv, poetry, writing
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