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10 August 2006 @ 03:14 pm
can't even get the hotline  
When my migraine overwhelmed me last night I was having recurring images of shooting myself in the head to get rid of the pain. Not a plan, just the image/thought. But rather than sit with that alone I wanted to call the hotline I used to volunteer on. Alas, they were on another call or else had no one for that shift.

It's just the way my life seems to be going right now.
thtreladythtrelady on August 10th, 2006 10:53 pm (UTC)
I'm really sorry that you suffer from migraines - it is pain that is just not needed. I hope you don't mind that I friended you.
Tapatitapati on August 10th, 2006 11:01 pm (UTC)
Oh thanks, it's good to see you!

thtreladythtrelady on August 10th, 2006 11:06 pm (UTC)
It's good to see you too!
equani_tsulaequani_tsula on August 11th, 2006 09:22 am (UTC)
I actually called suicide hotline one night and got a recording that I should call during business hours, and asked to please leave a message and someone would get back to me! Two or three days later someone finally called and when I sarcastically thanked them for the non-help CHEWED ME OUT. Way to not help depressed people! :P

Next time I'll just call the phone psychics *rolling eyes* That new medication sounds like hell. Some choice - Crohns or migraines. Surely there has to be a better solution.

*sending healing thoughts*
Tapatitapati on August 13th, 2006 05:35 am (UTC)
Our hotline is normally pretty good, but we're instructed to stay with a suicidal caller even if the second line rings. Then the answering service tells the person to call back later or asks if they need to speak to the nurse at the hospital (to assess their need to come in). (I used to volunteer there.) Occasionally they don't have a volunteer for a shift. It pays to call around to neighboring community hotlines as they all operate differently.

I think they can find me another Crohn's medication. There are a lot of options for it and if I have a mild case it shouldn't be too hard.

Thanks for the healing thoughts; it was better today.
equani_tsulaequani_tsula on August 17th, 2006 08:26 pm (UTC)
I do understand the suicide hotline is staffed by volunteers, and bless 'em indeed for doing what they do. It is just a joke to me - although it is a true story - a joke that affirms "just my luck", or "story of my life" - I reach out for help and get pushed aside for someone in greater need of help and/or the help simply is not available. Thus, it is obvious that I'm capable of making it on my own, much as I'd like a bit of help now and then, I don't NEED it as much as others do. I've made it this far, eh? :) I've kind of come to the conclusion that any help, in my own case, is a form of enabler. If ever I find someone/thing to lean on - I'll topple over or give up. I've got the hubby - bless his long suffering heart - and any more than that would be greedy of me!
labrys6 on August 11th, 2006 03:26 pm (UTC)
Oh, Geez!
Damn, I wish I had something really valuble to say on this, but it just sucks rocks. I have migraines so rarely now; I try to visualize the pain as a thermostat dial, which I turn DOWN....sometimes it seems to help Other times, as you can relate to ...you just want to pull the switch on the light chain! I hope it gets better soon. I am lighting up a candle for you!
Tapatitapati on August 13th, 2006 05:36 am (UTC)
Re: Oh, Geez!
Thanks for the candle. It was milder today and I was able to go out with my husband.